Writing my story with Jesus is challenging to say the least. To actually write this down, my hopes are that someone who is thinking about turning to Jesus, to be baptized, to be saved, or maybe never even thought about Jesus the way I am describing him, will take action to draw closer to Jesus.
I will start with an overview of my life and quickly get in to the story with Jesus.
I was born and given up for adoption. I was so very blessed to have been adopted by a loving Mother and Father, and an adopted sister. My Father was an auto mechanic and my Mother stayed home with us. Money was usually very tight, but we were a loving family and never seemed to be in dire need.
I married in my early twenties and we started having a family almost right away. There were challenges; raising a family of four, forming a bonding lasting marriage, working a job, making ends meet.
There were also great times; buying our first house, vacations to Hawaii, the kids sports, job promotions.
There were bad times; infidelity, excessive drinking, pornography, lying, boasting about how great I was.
My life started to come undone quickly. The bad times overcame the good times and after my 4 boys were grown and moved out of the house, I divorced my wife and moved out.
Soon after I left my wife, I began another relationship and it seemed to be going well. Unfortunately, the excessive drinking, pornography, lying, boasting, ego were all still in play.
Then the bottom fell out.
I lost my job that I held for over 20 years. It was a punch in the gut. The job loss triggered a new level of stress that I had never felt. In my mind I saw bills piling up, a large alimony payment, no way out. I would drink myself to sleep every night.
I did find another job, but only at half the pay, and with taxes, alimony payments, insurance, I was really barely bringing in 20% of my income. I also couldn’t get along with anyone at that job, I was constantly in arguments and disagreement with the way the company was being run. I came home every day more stressed out than the previous day. I felt like I had one foot in the grave, literally and figuratively.

I needed help, but didn’t know where to turn. To help me sleep, I would search you tube for someone to listen to in hopes I could fall asleep. I found two stations that seemed to help, and it was a bit of positivity that I needed. One channel was a gentleman name Wayne Dyer and the other was Dr. Joe Dispensza. I was lying in bed one night, headphones on, listening to a story Wayne was telling. I don’t remember the story, but as I was listening to him, something very strange happened to me.

My heart started radiating and getting warmer and warmer. I thought I may be having a heart attack (which wouldn’t have surprised me given my condition). I put my hands over my heart, and my chest was almost too hot to touch, but I left my hands on my chest anyway as it did feel soothing to the touch. I’m not sure how long it lasted, maybe a few minutes, but afterwards I was left with more questions than answers. As the days passed, I kept thinking about my heart, and what it was I experienced. I have to admit I thought about the Dr. Seuss cartoon, how the Grinch stole Christmas, and his heart grew 3 times when the true meaning of Christmas came through.
I am not going to say that after that night with the warming heart, my life changed immediately, but it did change that night.
The truth is, that was the night that Jesus Christ came into my heart.
Gradual changes started to happen. I started listening to Billy Graham, Dr. Charles Stanley, Joel Osteen, and others. These are famous preachers, but their messages resonated with me. I bought a bible and made a goal to read the Bible from front to back. I started praying every night. I memorized the Lords Prayer, and Psalm 23. I was on a journey and I didn’t even know I was on one.
I kept getting internal messages that I had to repent for my sins. I went as far back in my childhood as I could remember, and starting begging for forgiveness for all of the sins I committed. Somehow thinking I was righting a wrong, but knowing that I wasn’t ,made the process even more painful. This was really challenging to do, but over time I believe I covered most if not all of my wrong doings and repented for them. Note: Repenting for your sins does not just mean asking and pleading for forgiveness. When you repent of your sins, you are committing to Jesus that you will not in fact repeat these transgressions. You are stating to Jesus that you will strive to live your life as pure and righteous as humanely possible. Several months after I started repenting, I was driving down Pacific Coast Highway, past a large rock in the ocean in Morrow Bay. Again, I can’t explain this, but as I was driving, a movie started playing in my mind, a movie about my life, about all the indiscretions and sinful acts I had performed. The people that I hurt, the trail of pain and anguish I had caused. The movie lasted for what seemed like hours. When the movie ended I was in tears and was still driving past the rock in the ocean. I felt a weight lift off of me at that very moment, I was being forgiven!
As I said, the changes were gradual, but consistent.
However some changes were immediate and all temptation removed. I don’t drink alcohol anymore. And I mean that change happened over night. I didn’t pray for it, but Jesus removed the temptation of alcohol. Also the temptation of pornography was removed over night. Again, I didn’t pray for it, the temptation was removed by Jesus. Reading the Bible daily was instilled in me almost immediately. I was hungry for the knowledge of God. Meditating on God’s word and daily praying were instilled in me almost immediately.
My life has changed forever as a result of Jesus Christ. Certainly there are still challenges that life delivers to us here on earth. There are highs and lows, there are good seasons and challenging seasons. I still had challenges with finding a job, settling my divorce trial, IRS tax audits, health challenges, other litigations, mounting bills, ect. But, I did not take any of those challenges on by myself. I handed those challenges over to Jesus and prayed for his help. Can you imagine, being able to hand over an IRS tax issue to Jesus and ask for help? That is exactly what I did. I didn’t even worry about it, knowing that Jesus would help me and do whatever he felt was right. The peace I had once I handed the issue over to Jesus is indescribable.
The Peace and Harmony with the earth I have is unearthly. It is not of this world to have the inner peace I have been graced with. Many times I feel as though I am walking and living in heaven on earth. Certainly I pay attention to the noise of this earth, but it doesn’t affect me at all. Being under the care of the Lord Jesus Christ ensures I am protected from the human noises on earth. I have put all of my trust in the Lord, and therefore do not require any other allegiance, only to the Creator of the earth, the Creator of all things living and growing on this planet.
I have an unequaled love for God my Creator, Lord Jesus Christ my savior, and the Holy Spirit my teacher and comforter.
If you are in a storm today, and don’t know where to turn, Jesus is waiting with open arms for you.
1. Repent of your sins
2. Ask Jesus to come into your heart today
3. Read the Bible from front to back
4. Pray and meditate on God’s word daily
5. Join a bible based Church
John 3:16; For God so Loved the world, he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believe in him shall not perish, but have everlasting life.
Amen and Amen.